“He Hates the Orange Jesus as Much as I Do!” – Conway’s Scathing 10 MAGA Commandments Ignite Fury

Gabriel RomanOct 31, 2023

Minute Read

Attorney George Conway is known for his conservative stance. However, he recently took a sharp jab at House Republicans by crafting an incendiary version of the Ten Commandments. This was aimed directly at the party’s loyalty to Donald Trump. This bold move has sparked an intense conversation across social media.

Conway’s Social Media Skewer

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George Conway took to X to launch his version of the commandments. It was a direct counter to accolades directed at Speaker Mike Johnson’s proclaimed Christian faith. His sharp satire openly questioned whether Johnson’s beliefs would lean heavily on the scales of House governance. This sparked a conversation about faith’s role in the secular space of politics.

Commandments as House Decor?

To begin, Conway suggested that his mock commandments be displayed in every Republican’s office “per order of the Speaker.” This was a clear jab at how religion and politics have become intertwined. The comment left some amused and others confused, as it blurred the lines between sacred texts and political directives.

The First and Foremost Rule

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The reimagined commandments started with an attack on Republican loyalty to Trump: “Thou shalt have no other gods before me, except thou shalt followeth thy Orange Jesus over any moral cliff.” Conway challenged the depths of their allegiance sarcastically by suggesting Trump was the Republican Party’s ultimate leader.

Merchandise and Mockery

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Conway’s second commandment poked fun at the commercialization of Trump’s brand: “Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image unless thou shalt have purchaseth it on [Trump’s website].” Conway mocked how merchandise sales are woven into the political fabric. He highlighted Trump’s use of personal branding in politics.

Sacred Name, Secular Slights

The third commandment in Conway’s list sarcastically excuses taking the Lord’s name in vain for political point-scoring. “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain, except when thou shalt attacketh Brandon or thy RINOs.” In doing this, Conway pointed out the hypocrisy of some Republicans using the Lord’s name.

Boebert’s Broadway Quip

For the fourth commandment, Conway looked at the theatrical realm with a sly dig at Rep. Lauren Boebert’s attendance at a “Beetlejuice” musical. He twisted the sanctity of the Sabbath by saying: “Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy, unless thou attendeth a musical production in Denver.”

Golf Courses and Graves

Taking a darker turn, the fifth commandment touches on familial respect with dark humor: “Honour thy father and thy mother, and burieth thy mother on thy father’s golf course.” Conway’s mockery suggests that even in death, personal benefit and familial duty are blended together in a noticeable way.

Lethal Loopholes

The sixth commandment criticized policy stances on violence and immigration. He said, “Thou shalt not kill, but thou shalt shooteth looters on sight, and puteth alligators in thy moat to keepeth out the Mexicans.” This commandment paints a grim picture of the extreme measures supported by some Republicans under the illusion of protection and security.

Infidelity and Finances

With the seventh commandment, Conway mocked personal scandals and the following cover-ups: “Thou shalt not commit adultery, but if thou shalt do so with thy **** star, thou shalt payeth her off through an intermediary and falsifieth thy accounting records.” Conway criticized Trump’s apparent moral failings and the lengths he allegedly took to conceal them.

Election Fraud and Classified Documents

Targeting the controversial topics head-on, the eighth commandment mocked the alleged election fraud and mishandling of sensitive documents. Conway said, “Thou shalt not steal unless thou needeth to steeleth one moreth than a certain number of popular votes or unless thou can hideth thy stollen documents at thy bathroom in thy resort.” Stolen was deliberately misspelled by Conway.

The Truth Twisted

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The ninth commandment delivers a short but cutting remark on honesty: “Thou shalt not bear false witness. LOL.” It appears that Conway is joking about the number of times that Republican Party officials have been in trouble for lying. Ironically, this is one of the things that Christianity forbids.

Covetousness and Corruption

Conway wraps up his list with a commandment that reflects on the desire for what others have: “Thou shalt not covet (but seeth nos. 2, 4, 7, and 8 aboveth).” It’s a tongue-in-cheek way of highlighting previous points about how greed, politics, and moral flexibility have become mixed together. Overall, it’s clear how Conway feels about the Republican party.

Praise for the Satire

Reactions from the online crowd were mixed. Some individuals cheered as one user exclaimed, “Oh, this is good. Sadly accurate and true. Oh, this is good.” It’s clear that Conway’s satire resonated with many, capturing their views on the current state of politics with a mix of humor and sad truth.

Shared Disdain

Echoing the feelings of many critics, another reaction highlighted a shared hatred for the former president: “He hates the orange Jesus as much as I do!” It seems that some users agreed with Conway’s portrayal of Trump as they, too, felt a deep-seated frustration towards the Republican Party and its actions.

Masterful Mockery

Applauding the sharpness of Conway’s wit, one commentator remarked, “That’s an almost god-level trolling.” Other users echoed this view. This suggests that the commandments were not just seen as simple jokes by some people. Instead, they saw these commandments as a smart critique of American politics.

Biblical Amnesia

These comments also spurred some users to talk about past actions. One user said, “Anyone else remember when Trump said the Bible was his favorite book but couldn’t name a single quote out of it? Good times.” This appeared to be a common view, as many criticized the apparent insincerity in Trump’s past statements about his faith.

GOP’s Grim Forecast

Discussing the broader implications, one person noted, “The GOP is as dysfunctional as ever. We are witnessing the end of the GOP! It will take decades to rebuild.” This gloomy prognosis suggests that Conway’s commandments reflect deeper issues within the party that may take years to address.

MAGA Ridicule

However, some offered a more scathing critique of Trump’s most passionate followers. One user said, “The MAGAs need to be ridiculed as they are what real traitors to a country act like… to actually believe an election can be stolen based on the word of a confirmed serial liar. Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.”